All posts tagged: the love chronicles

How science can be spiritual

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I spend a lot of time on this blog talking about what I don’t believe and how I think the way we live should be different. That’s necessary, but also kind of a bummer. So what exactly do I believe in? My evolution to get here was about as long as my life. I feel like I’ve lived a very typical, Western, white girl life. I grew up with non-religious, non-judgmental, supportive parents, and I was encourage to go to school above everything else. I had my very mild rebellious teenage phase. For a split second I wanted to be Wiccan, then atheist, then just travel the world because, fuck it, life is short. I mocked the concept of God as a man in the sky with white beard, I still kind of do, sorry. But somewhere along the line I did develop spirituality.  And it’s science-based, somehow. As much as I can’t get on board when people say “God” because I feel too much evil has been used in “God’s” name, I do very …

If this was happiness

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Rita Hayworth was the most beautiful woman in the world. She said the happiest time of her life was with her second husband, Orson Welles. She was so proud he picked her; at the time he was the wizard of Hollywood, everyone wanted a piece of him and he wanted her. He’d seen a picture of her in Life magazine, a picture of her sitting on her bed in a satin slip, and he said, “That’s the girl, I’m gonna marry her.” And he did, and it was the happiest time of her life. The shyest girl in all of Hollywood who never wanted the title “The Love Goddess.” She worked so hard for him; reading the literature he gave her, took a stand on current politics, his, of course. Everything to keep up with his restlessness and nationally declared genius. He left her. Twice. Then her beloved husband later said, reflecting back on their time together, “If this was happiness, imagine what the rest of her life had been!” In The Lady from Shanghai, …

First love is all right, as far as it goes. Last love, that’s what i’m interested in

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Tracy, Hepburn, 1942 Now I’m going to tell you about Spencer. You may think you’ve waited a long time. But let’s face it, so did I. I was thirty-three. It seems to me I discovered what “I love you” really means. It means I put you and your interests and your comfort ahead of my own interests and my own comfort because I love you. What does this mean? I love you. What does it mean? Think. We use this expression very carelessly. LOVE has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get – only with what you are expecting to give – which is everything. What you will receive in return varies. But it really has no connection with what you give. You give because you love and you cannot help giving. If you are very lucky, you may be loved back. That’s delicious but it does not necessarily happen. It really implies total devotion. And total is all-encompassing – the good of you, the bad of you. I am aware I …

Diamond Head

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I had forgotten how much I love collages until I started playing with them again. I like how they tell a story – like a mini-movie. This one is from the day I left. It was a really beautiful day. And I will be back soon! I could only stay away for two months. When it comes down to the choice between love and money, I have always chosen love. I firmly believe that at the end of my life, whenever that may be, I will be happy I did.

Weekend in Maui

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A belated celebration weekend in Maui with my love. There were no end to the things we had saved up to celebrate; our fourth anniversary, my birthday, his end-of-semester, Christmas, Valentines, our engagement, us, love and life! It was the perfect way to close this chapter and I’m ready to embark on the next one now. I can tell because I have a very strong desire to dye my hair back to brown. The blonde me was a knowledge-gathering drifting student in Honolulu. Brunette me means business, in more ways than one. I really want to start a little business of my own because if there is one thing this year has taught me is that a sustainable life means live your values and value how you live. Dozens of job applications later it dawned on me that most jobs advertised are about making already wealthy people wealthier. The best thing I can do for this planet and my happiness is to make my living from an ecologically sustainable source. What a win-win situation! I …