I spend a lot of time on this blog talking about what I don’t believe and how I think the way we live should be different. That’s necessary, but also kind of a bummer. So what exactly do I believe in?
My evolution to get here was about as long as my life. I feel like I’ve lived a very typical, Western, white girl life. I grew up with non-religious, non-judgmental, supportive parents, and I was encourage to go to school above everything else. I had my very mild rebellious teenage phase. For a split second I wanted to be Wiccan, then atheist, then just travel the world because, fuck it, life is short. I mocked the concept of God as a man in the sky with white beard, I still kind of do, sorry. But somewhere along the line I did develop spirituality. And it’s science-based, somehow.
As much as I can’t get on board when people say “God” because I feel too much evil has been used in “God’s” name, I do very much believe in energies. I love the absolute fact that energy cannot be created or destroyed – just transformed. Because that means every single thing we see or think or are, has been around since the beginning of the universe. It is assumed that right now, our life form, is third generation star dust. I love that. When the universe was created there were only hydrogen and helium. Then those elements fused in nuclear stars for billions of years, and eventually the collapse of those stars led to the creation of new elements. We are a carbon-based life form, so we are third generation of those fusions. That means the matter that I’m made of have been around since the dawn of time; I’m just wearing it in a different form. That’s the physical aspect of belief.
The spiritual aspect is even better. I do believe in the soul. I think it’s the conscious aspect of being alive, and that’s why we’re all a little bit different but mostly the same. Who knows, maybe it really does weight 21 grams and at the time of our death it leaves our body. That would be pretty cool. I think our soul is the collective intelligence of the universe and when we are born we are infused with our own little piece of it. It doesn’t belong to the piece of flesh we happen to be wearing at the time; this is a concept way beyond our ‘ego’. Our ego, or identity, is created within the society we happen to be born into. I happen to come from materialistic, individualized culture so my ego happens to be particularly strong but I try not to hold that against myself. I don’t believe my ego is my soul. My soul is so much bigger than my ego. My ego will die with me; my soul will simply leave my body at the time of my death and return to the universe’s lifestream. Is this a finite resource? I don’t know. I’m not that smart.
But I do believe in soul mates. I have had it happen too many times not to. It is when you meet someone and your soul instantly recognizes them. Whether it is a physical attraction or just friendship, it is when you meet someone and you know that this is your person. And I think you have multiple people throughout your lifetime. Friends, lovers, husbands and wives. How else can you explain locking eyes with someone across the room and having a physical reaction. I call it the ‘jolt’. It happens when I see someone I have never seen before but as soon as we lock eyes, my body will jolt, as if struck by lightening. I used to be embarrassed by this. I used to think it was just finding someone cute in a crowd, like our culture teaches us. It couldn’t possibly be a cosmic, spiritual reunion. But it is that strong. It’s finding someone cute in a crowd, and having your soul recognize them from whatever souls usually do when they are not trapped in human form, and wanting to reconnect. That’s how I met my husband. That’s how I learned some of the biggest truths about myself. Of course, being soul mates is just the beginning of the journey. Marriage is first and foremost about commitment. Some days I run into other soul mates of mine. My body jolts. Our eyes lock for the first time. But I choose my husband because my ego wants to remain pure and loved by only one person. Your soul is playful and adventurous. Sometimes you’ve got to keep it in check.
And that’s why I’m so angry all the time. If I believed we were just stupid monkeys coming to the end of our life cycle, I would be fine with us polluting and trashing our home into extinction. But I believe we are so much more than that! We are billions of years of universal evolution and we should know better. Right now our minds are hijacked by the culture we live in, but deep down, we know this isn’t right. We can sense it. Our connection to the universe will not allow us to be happy in such a self-centered, destructive state.
honeythatsok 
I must admit, this is really a wonderful post…informative, insightful and inspiring.
You have touched on some of the most vital aspects of our life and living. The space or the universe we are in and how has it evolved and where is it going to go. That it is all about energy and the transformation from one form to another…magical to visual and imagine the continuous phenomena of energy transformation.
The fascinating facet of our soul and the devil’s aspect of our ego…soul moves on and the ego ceases to exist with the death of body. Sometime we wonder if we let go the ego, life becomes wonderful but still we cling onto our ego…what forces to hold onto negative energy and negativity in life.
Science can makes us understand so much and so far, there are aspects which is better understood and appreciated with spiritual eye…soul, spirituality and search for the origin of life, universe and want to know more of our existence and the purpose of living…
What is the real purpose of life & living?
Loved the various intriguing thoughts you have brought out and looking forward to more such brilliant pieces from your desk…
Best Wishes!!!
I’ve written some pieces that are similar to this, so I have say, it really spoke to me. Every sentence I kept going, yes, yes, seriously? yeees! :)
I’m so thankful that you liked my post, not just because of the like, but because it brought me to your amazing blog! (: i love the way you write, its so smooth and intriguing (: following your blog now, and can’t wait to read your other posts ^^
Such a sweet comment :) Thank you so much! I love your blog name, I will be following yours right back <3
This is my favorite thing I’ve read in a long time! I have written and written and written in so many journals trying to put my beliefs into words but never managed as well as you have here. I was raised like you, but I grew up in a pretty conservative small town and always had this internal fear of religion…you know, the whole “what if I don’t call myself a follower of this particular religion, die, and am punished by this white-bearded God man for all eternity for being wrong!” Yet I just couldn’t ever bring myself to jump on board with my religious friends. I especially didn’t want to do it out of fear. It just never felt right for me. Still though, the uncertainty of not really understanding my beliefs – or what I should believe – was scary. Still is sometimes. But what you wrote here, I don’t find this scary at all! It’s actually really comforting. I am saving it to read to myself in the future! Thank you :)
Thank you so much for this touching and personal comment. I can’t describe to you how much it means to me that my writing somehow added a little something to someone’s life and experience. And it always means the world to know that someone out there is feeling the same things as myself – it makes the world seem less lonely and scary :) If you have a blog I would love to subscribe to it and keep sharing thoughts and ideas! <3
You know I have tried a few times to start a blog and just never succeeded! (Hence why I have this old bloodless WordPress account!) Sometimes I think I’d like to take excerpts from my little journals and put them into a blog, but I don’t even know where to begin! I’ll let you know if I actually manage one of these days :)
And yes, your writing is both powerful and relatable! Keep it up!
Haha bloodless works perfectly! I totally thought that was what you originally said ;) I think you should just put it up. All stories, and all writing, matter on some level – even if only to ourselves :)
Thank you again so much! I will keep following your bloodless blog in hopes maybe some day something will flow.
That was meant to say blog-less not bloodless! Silly autocorrect. Bloodless, whattt computer? :P
Aww you’re awesome…well I am inspired now so who knows! Maybe something will pop up sometime soon!
Thanks for writing this post! I was having trouble verbalizing my belief in energies and you said it so beautifully: “I love the absolute fact that energy cannot be created or destroyed – just transformed. Because that means every single thing we see or think or are, has been around since the beginning of the universe.” This belief has given me a new perspective on life. It has redefined me from who I was taught to be and who I want to become. I thought you might be interested in this video I came across. It’s about space exploration and how humanity changed (in a positive direction) after our visit to the moon…”We went to the moon and we discovered Earth…”
Thanks for the video! I love that quote about discovering Earth from the moon. It’s crazy how our generation just takes for granted that we always knew how the world looked from space, but that’s quite a recent thing. It should serve as a unifying idea but looking around at all the destruction and war going on, we still seem to be some ways off from that… :(
Thank you for this beautiful and uplifting comment though – I love meeting people with similar philosophy on life.
I wasn’t that hip on your pics though… no matter, you write refreshingly.
The rest of the article was magical. I loved it and I agree with others that you write and philosophize beautifully and more importantly with strong logic and conclusions that don’t come across over stated or arrogant. One of the comments came across arrogant or even a little offensive to me. “There is genuine beauty and spirit in a universe without a guiding intelligence.” I think it is the all knowing sense in what was sort of a shallow business as usual comment. I got some unique ideas from your text on soul mate theory that brought back strong memories, one in particular. Other sections were just a far more eloquent description of my beliefs based on, as you say, “science”, history, and experience along with a degree of willingness to sense what biologists think of as forbidden perceptions.
There is a “re-wild” word on the street that coupled to your article reminds me of what I have sought all my life: The need to balance in spontaneous action on “instinct” into a generally controlled life of integrity. I appreciated what you said of recognizing soul mates but choosing your husband, that is an unusual balance of understanding that I can really respect. I think you are quite enlightened and certainly encouraging! I think your article is worth re-posting if you would allow me.
Cool post, I just started reading it and identified amazingly. I will get back to it soon and try to read all and the comments. Your right on!
Thanks for the vote of confidence :) I hope you enjoy it!
It reminds me of Paulo Coelho’s book Brida. It goes pretty much on the same lines. I believe in God and you believe in energy which is pretty much the same. And let me tell you this, if you come to India, you will have to be accustomed with the concept of 33 crores of Gods ;)
It differs with region & religion & soul I guess.
But yes, the jolt is true. I haven’t experienced the instant jolt. But I have experienced the process of unveiling the soulmate. Sometimes there are more than one, and it is up to us to deal things the right way.
Thanks for finding me & in turn helping me find you. Love your blog :)
Thank you for saying what God is to one person and energy is to another is, at the end of the day, pretty much the same thing. It took almost my whole life to realize that, and it’s such a crucial step to accepting that we are all one even though we express it differently. And that’s okay.
Your blog is really cute and I’m happy to have found it! :)
You’re well on your way to defeating your anger and sadness. They’re both incredibly important, because they motivate us to change things for the better, but it’s important that we do not give ourselves entirely over to them; there’s too many other cool feelings to experience!
I am a VERY fortunate soul! You can figure why…hehe ;)
Right ON!!!
Have you ever heard of Joseph Campbell? An avid reader and lover of storytelling, such as yourself, would appreciate his work. He popularized the monomyth. But the real reason I bring him up is that he thought people who perceive myths literally are silly, and atheists silly for calling the Bible a lie, when really the stories in the Bible are metaphors. I myself don’t think there is an anthropomorphic patriarch in the sky, but the fact that the same archetypes pervade all cultures is very interesting. That being said, I find the fact that I’m breathing particles that once comprised a t-Rex spiritual, as if life has come full circle. I don’t believe in soul mates, but I have found the fact that both my boyfriend and myself have fun together miraculous. If anything, my disbelief in soul mates makes me all the more grateful that he has chosen to live with me, and it wasn’t preordained. It took me six months to fall in love, and even if our initial attraction was inspired by chemicals and hormones, there’s magic in that too.
Thanks for another “yes, this!” post. I think I’ve found a blogmate! :)
When it comes to the human condition, I toggle back and forth between optimism and anger (exacerbated by my own battles with ego and hypocrisy). One book that helped me shift more toward optimism was “Spontaneous Evolution” by Bruce Lipton and Steve Bhaerman. It’s well worth a read, IMO. I hope they’re right…
There is genuine beauty and spirit in a universe without a guiding intelligence. Your point about monogamy was nuanced in that our desires and appetites are far more powerful and polymorphous than our culture allows but we can and do exercise control and integration in our lives. I find that contemplation and awareness of the world as it is, not as we would wish it to be, leads to awareness and acceptance of it’s intrinsic beauty
Very well put! Couldn’t agree more. I was bought up the same although was made to go to church until about ten, then refused to go. I could not belive all that, sorry to those who do! But when I was doing my Reiki training, I found spirituality. I would now call myself spiritual and follow I guess spiritual practices. Like you to me god is everything, as in everything gives off energy and this energy connects everything in the universe.
As for soul partners, what you said makes a lot of sense to me. Last year met a soul mate we hit it off instantly. Unfortunately due to her religion we can no longer be together and this is what stops me from being religious or following a religion. We both feel very bad and tried against the odds. She wants to follow her religious beliefs. I met someone just the other day who I had a ‘jolt’ with and arranged to meet her, reading you post on more than one soul partners really put my mind as rest. Although I still am very upset about losing a soul partner, I fell I can try again without feeling bad, thanks! I don’t belive people should be judged on what they belive or should only be with someone who belive exactly the same, how else will people evolve and develop without integration. This is what I belive spirituality offers freedom of belive without control, freedom of decision is the most important thing in life. How else can we develop as a being, if we have someone else telling us what to do! Whether we make these decision as we go along or before I am still undecided but I am loving the journey i am on!
Thanks!
Hi, thank you for the like. Your blog is interesting, and you write well. I like biographies too, great way to travel across time. I am a believer though in God: not the pray to me every day kinda God, but in the power that creates and sustains us all. And thanks to the culture I have been brought up in, this power has a name, a face and loads of fascinating stories attached to it.
I find your articles on spirituality interesting, helps me understand your way of looking at things and makes me question yet again, so what would happen to the human race if we did not have the story of God?
May be I will find answers here among your posts. thanks for stopping by.
Thank you very much for your insightful comment! I’m very grateful when people having different views are able to find beauty in each other’s story and co-exist peacefully. I really think it’s the only way we’re going to be able to survive on this beautiful planet.
I find religious texts to have historical significance and the ultimate proof that humans haven’t been that different in the 6,000 years or so of recorded history. We still face the same moral struggles and we should learn from that. And I don’t think art would have been as well preserved without religion so that’s another benefit.
Thank you for stopping by and I look forward to following your blog.